Anyway, let's get the show on the road. Here's Alice.
Greg: Welcome, Alice! Alice, that's a lovely name, but, uh, I don't know your full name, what exactly is it?
Alice: Some people say that my full name is Alice Liddell, a young friend of Mr. Carroll's. Personally, I prefer to be called Alice. Just Alice. As for my last name...I'm not telling!
Greg: Oh, well, okay, Alice it is, then. How old are you, Alice?
Alice: I'm seven annd a half, if you please, but many people are surprised by that. They always think I'm older, although I can't understand why.
Greg: Yes, well, if I may say so, you seem very grown up for one so young. As I mentioned in the introduction, your first adventure began when you chased a little white rabbit down a hole. What about the rabbit attracted your attention, and why did you chase him down a hole?
Alice: First of all, I would like to make it perfectly plain that I was in no way looking to cause anyone any problems. in spite of what the Queen of Hearts might say. My growth spurt had nothing to do with the stolen tarts. It was also not my intention to knock over the jury box. Besides, not allowing people to grow a mile tall is such a silly law. I'll admit that it is out of the ordinary, but certainly nothing to lose one's head over.
Greg: I heartily agree with that, my dear, but you didn't really answer the question.
Alice: Question? What question?
Greg: What made you chase the rabbit down the hole?
Alice: Rabbit? Oh, yes of course, the rabbit. As I recall, it was a dreadfully boring summer day. There was nothing to do except laze by the river. When the White Rabbit ran past, it was impossible not to notice him. For one thing, I was bored, for another, who wouldn't notice a rabbit dressed in a smart suit of clothes, looking at his pocketwatch? It's just not the sort of thing one sees every day, or at least it wasn't then. so of course I had to follow him.
Greg: When you put it that way, how could you not? Following the rabbit got you started on what would be a long, strange trip, so to speak. What stands out as the strangest encounter on your journey?
Alice: Oh dear, how can I choose just one? So many strange things happened on my adventure. I suppose that if I had to pick just one, I should say the Hatter was truly a unique character. It was impossible to know if he meant what he said, or if he said what he meant.
Greg: I beg your pardon? I don't think I quite followed that.
Alice: Exactly. I tried to follow him, but I couldn't. Try as I might I could not follow him, although he was following me the whole time. That's not all. Every time I thought I had found him, he would open up his mouth and lose me again.
His poetry was simply hideous. It made no sense at all. And his riddles.. I mean, really. Why is a raven like a writing desk? He didn't even have an answer. How backward! I don't think he knew what he was talking about at all.
It was very frustrating, and the March Hare was absolutely no help whatsoever. He was mad, completely loopy. All he wanted to do was to pour out the tea. That's enough about that. it aggravates me no end just thinking about the entire affair!
Greg: Fair enough. I can't say that I blame you. What can you tell me about the Queen of Hearts?
Alice: Oh, she was another one. Completely unreasonable. I don't care if she is a queen, she'd no right to treat people the way that she did--accusing the Knave of Hearts of stealing her tarts, using flamingos as croquet mallets, and making silly laws. She's nothing but a bully. If I hear off with their head one more time, I shall simply scream!
Greg: Well, I guess you've made yourself perfectly clear on that score. I see the White Rabbit signalling me that our time is up. Thank you so much for spending some time to chat with us, Alice. It was a pleasure.
Alice: You're perfectly welcome. Now if you'll excuse me, I must be going. The Cheshire Cat's grin has misplaced the Cheshire Cat, and I promised that I would help him find himself. I'm late enough as it is!